Equality verses Equity

I attended a conference today on the best Start for Life programme through the 1001 critical days of a child’s life and how these days are influential to the child’s whole learning and developmental journey to adulthood.  Within this conference I was intrigued by personal accounts of two people who shared their journeys on how they experienced parenthood within those early stages of perinatal and postnatal periods.   The aftermath was just as interesting.   

A lady shared the differences in how she experienced her birth of all her children where she questioned her experiences based on equality verses equity.  A lady of BAME origin, gave birth to her third child, who was born at 32 weeks weighing 1 kg.  As she left the hospital after 6 weeks of the child being in intensive care unit, the lady was still unsure what she had to do and how to manage.  But to her surprise the support and guidance was limited as the assumption from health was that she was already a mother to two grown children so she knows what to do.  Although, the lady argued that there are many changes that are not considered in this assumption of how little a mother actually knows about every experience of giving to a child that is unique and different.  What about experiencing two miscarriages before having this child and the emotional wellbeing, what about not being a mother for a period hence not remembering those stages, what about having a child that is so fragile and less than 30 cm and weighs so little that you find it hard to touch or handle.  Many of these questions are left unthoughtful and it left the lady feeling disregarded but also marginalised. Therefore, the importance of working together and taking into account of all diverse needs and individual aspects was stressed and embedded the importance of early experiences to be a positive, unique and influencing moment for the children and their parents/carers. 

On the other hand, another personal account was about a father’s journey of his experience in being a father to 7 children and how his voice of a father was not seen or/and heard.  As a White British man, he stressed this sharing that the social view is that fathers provide the practical element in the child’s life whilst the mother provided the emotional element.  Although, as times have changed, so should the narrative and social view.  The roles are very much equal if not fathers being more of a caring and nurturing role especially after the pandemic where much of the norm was changed.  The father was inspirational in his view, sharing how he wanted to be heard and be part of the children’s learning and development whilst being alongside his wife who was sharing a very difficult, anxious pregnancy and traumatic birth.  For both of them it was a period of sheer joy, although he was not prepared on how the birth itself would impact him and his mental health. As with many parents, and most definitely dads, it’s later on in life that fathers realise the impact that events have had.  He found it hard because he knew he was struggling but he didn’t have enough education to know what was the problem.  He experienced it over 8 years and having sought help, it was put down as him being in the military and being injured, whilst just giving him antidepressants.  But, as time passed, he realised that his mental health was around the time of pregnancies because of the anxieties of traumas happening.  No one noticed, the time of birth it can go wrong so quickly, and fathers are just standing there in the corner thinking oh my god… and then once it’s unfolded there are just supposed to move on.   As a father, this was the most difficult thing for him to get over and as a way forward he has taken role in influencing change in the narrative and social view whilst engaging in research and running a paternal mental health support programme. 

The two accounts of the individuals were very catching to the many in the room including head of services, councillor and many other.  The diverse population of the UK is represented by various ethnic groups, each with their own distinct cultural identities and health beliefs. There is a poor understanding of population diversity, lack of language and cultural competence, together with institutional racism, that can create barriers for patient access to primary care services. Research by Oluwatosin (2021) shared the inequalities and disparities in healthcare that are not a new problem and strategies have been attempted to tackle such issues in the past, but the lack of progress has been limited and the current COVID-19 pandemic has further highlighted the ongoing disparity in outcomes for BAME communities. The current reality facing many ethnic minority patients is one of substandard healthcare. Primary care, being the front door to healthcare services, must consistently and competently strive to meet the needs of the whole population.  Although, the experience from the lady in the conference who shared her journey identifies that there remains a great deal of work to ensure that all patients, regardless of their background, receive equitable access to healthcare.

Whereas, 6000 men take their own lives in the UK every year and the statistics say that 1 in 10 new dads will experience postnatal depression. They need a proper pathway for dads to get support and understand what they’re experiencing. Society has this idea of what a man should be, what they do or not do - men don’t cry. And if they cry, they are week and seen as not being able to provide for the family.  But, if they do talk - where do they go, how do they get the support?

Both personal narratives have given way to my passion on inclusion which I strongly emphasise and advocate.  It can be assumed that everyone gets the same opportunities but it is evident that they based on individual differences.  As I sat thinking this during the break and making some notes, I watched the crowd with interest, sipping on my tea.  Two important people in the hierarchy (both men) drifted their way to the father to introduce themselves and share that they would like to work further with his programme.  Although, they did not approach the lady, but other women in the conference did.  Mhhhh.  Not sure but I think lots of work needs to be done.  There needs to be a change in the mindset of the society as times progress, whilst reflecting on how individuals’ actions or thoughts are affecting others.  We need to change the thinking of seeing individuals as ‘who they are and not what they are’.  We are all individuals living in one world with one life.  But it is up to us on how we influence this life and the people in the world.  As a result we will be the role models to give the best start to life to all children by working together as one.